Perspective

Time is an interesting partner in life. It can go too quick, to slow or stand still, it seems.

They say that time heals all wounds but I think it allows for scars to grow over them but whatever it does; it allows those lucky enough to live in it the opportunity to go on in their life.

Now what I am going to write here might sound disrespectful and I do not intend it to be that way but I have not had a single lonely thought about my mom since she has been gone. She has been dead over a year now and in that time I have been released from all of the hurt and pain that I was in during her last years of life.

Thank you God!

All of the thinking about what happened in our dynamic is all gone and if it is thought about it is summarily cast into a fire called, “No thanks”. I am no longer under the weight of having to call her and listen to her complaints or to just know that she wasn’t happy in her life.

I revel everyday in being an orphan, I do. I revel in knowing that part of my life is over and I never have to relive it again. But not lost in all the euphoria is the life lessons learned during that painful time and I have charged myself with the following:

I will strive to take care of myself physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally on a daily basis.

I will strive to remember that I have raised my children and that they are good capable people, just like I wanted them to be. I will be their peer not their father.

I will remember that my children have my best interests at heart even when I do not want to hear what they have to say.

I will humble myself to all of the possibilities of life and be open as much as I can be to the changes that will be coming in future years.

I will treasure my grandchildren on a daily basis even if I do not see them. I will keep them close to me and will endeavor to impart some good from me to them, if possible.

I will try to look at my feet instead of the sky so that I might see my path more clearly.

I will try to never invoke my will through coercion or emotional blackmail but rather be accepting of all parties to what is best in their life.

I will thank God for all blessings given in the past and in hope for the future.

I do not want to give to my children in my older years what was given to me by my mother. They deserve so much more than that and I will do everything to make sure that I deliver on this promise.